Do you believe in signs? I do. Little ‘reminders’ have been dropping into my life like little packages of food dropped into war-torn countries. Perhaps I am in need of signs as much as those people are in need of food.
Some of my signs include having people randomly like some of my blog posts, start following my blog, “like” my Facebook page, respond to my ad for a memoir writing group, and finally I’ve been asked to write someone’s memoir.
All of these events which seems so small keep popping up in my mailbox like little reminders that say “Memoir writing… Memoir writing… Memoir writing. ” over and over again. Little nudges for me to get back to writing and exploring; thinking and evaluating.
So I’ve asked myself what am I supposed to do? It seems as though the universe is asking me to start writing again but yet I do not have the desire to do so. I buy a book to help motivate me (The Plot Whisperer Book of Writing Prompts by Martha Alderson). I set my alarm to see if I can trick myself into writing by being to tired to know what I am doing. It doesn’t work. My writing-self has not outsmarted my logical-self.
Then I started thinking that maybe I’m not necessarily suppose to write. Maybe I’m supposed to help someone. Maybe I just need to get back into some life-story-rhythm and see what happens.
No, that is not entirely true. Writing is my voice. It is how I make sense of my thoughts. I can feel the writing version of me inside me. She is trapped. She is patient though. Quietly waiting. Sitting in her cage observing me. She watches but I know she is paying keen attention. She is smarter than me.