When you start doing things that move you in the right direction on you life-journey, the world tosses you a bone now and then to keep you motivated. It can be hard going sometimes and one needs some encouragement once in a while whether it is from a good friend, business advisor or a bit of cosmic magic.
My husband has control over our finances. Rightfully so because he has such a green thumb with it. He grows it and I harvest it.
It irritates me that I have to ask him for money though. He is fairly generous with it in terms of shuffling it over but still I find it hard to ask someone for money. It is a very humbling experience. I have to force my ego to bow every time.
It hit me a couple of months ago that I have used up half of my RSPs to cope with not asking him for money. I realized that my RSPs are a bandaid, a crutch for me to fall on. I needed to stop escaping from a larger issue and deal with it.
My strategy is to continue to make myself vulnerable and kneel to Craig for money. I have a lesson to learn and I best pay attention. However, I do not intend to bow forever.
In addition to making myself talk to Craig more about money expenses I also started looking for work to bring in money for myself. This proved futile and only lasted a few weeks. I can not go back to the 9-5 world.
So I begin to design a workshop for memoir writing. I have been sitting on this idea for 18 months. I get my act together and design my curriculum and begin marketing it.
Everything falls into place easily. It is reassuring when everything is easy. I received positive attitudes while I was in my local communities and chatting with people. Craig and I are going along pretty smoothly except for me not discovering a lesson.
I have been practicing my new money strategy for two months. I am about to crack and take money out of my RSPs because I need gas money and I am exhausted from all the bowing I have been doing. I need a reprieve. Something tells me to check my account balance before I withdraw from my savings. I do and I am ecstatically surprised! I have an extra two thousand dollars in my account.
Is this a gift from the universe to keep me moving? A little bone or treat to keep me motivated. I feel as though the universe is saying “Good job Marlene. Don’t give up now. Keep moving forward.”